What Is a Googly?: The Mysteries of Cricket Explained kPain by as a large a group of people as possible This book was Jen s BEST revenge her ex husband Marco is an imbecile I hope Jen got her HEA and I hope Marco s thing shrivels up and falls off BOOM That s it it s not asking for too much is it I struggled to finish listening to this memoirA Beautiful Terrible Thing A Memoir of Marriage and Betrayal by Jen Waite This audiobook narrated by the author was described as an account of this young woman s heartbreaking discovery of life destroying lies and what her life was like in the aftermath of her demolished marriage I admit I was pulled in by the dramatic words and I had the impression that something extraordinary must have occurred between this woman Jen Waite and her husband Marco I don t want to trivialize this woman s pain she was very clearly hurt angry and felt betrayed by her husband and I don t doubt that to her what occurred felt like the end of her life or at least the life she had imagined and planned for Sadly and unfortunately her story is far from uncommon Several weeks after the birth of the couple s first child a daughter Jen Waite stumbled upon an email between her husband and a woman a message which made her stomach drop and made her suspicious that her husband was having an affair This suspicion led her down a path of engaging in amateur detective work and hyper vigilance Since she possessed the passwords to Marco s social media accounts and his email she went looking for proof And when people are searching for something they usually find what they are looking forThe story of this marriage is told in moving from before the betrayal to after the betrayal and Ms Waite relates every minute detail of her failed relationship in what sound like daily diary entries the emails text messages and dozens of phone calls between her husband and a young Croatian woman he had been having an affair with even speaking with her on the night his daughter was born Ms Waite also began obsessively stalking the woman s Facebook page as well She confronts Marco with the evidence she has collected and it really is no surprise that he denies the relationship but he continues to lie to her and continues the relationship with the other woman Eventually Ms Waite who has become so emotionally distraught she cannot take care of her infant calls her parents who pick her her daughter and her belongings up and move them to Maine to her parent s home where she then holes up in her childhood bedroom with her newborn daughter wallowing in self pity for months Inow I sound harsh and I don t mean to be impatient with this womanCoping with the end of her marriage and the fact she had a newborn baby to care for was extremely difficult But I couldn t rid myself of the recurrent thought that she was actually uite fortunate her parents were so supportive of her and allowed her to completely fall apart while they ept a roof over her and her daughter s head Perhaps it didn t occur to her that this scenario of a marriage ending badly plays out every day and many people do not have the luxury of retreating to their childhood bedrooms in their parents homes when life s calamities occur Many people do not have the luxury of grief or self pity as their lives and their children s lives depend on their continuing to go through the motions of life even if they don t feel like doing so It wasn t even Jen Waite s self indulgent attitude which bothered me most about this book and caused me to actually talk back to her narration The aspect of the story which continues to bother me is that she decided after researching online that is she read several articles that the explanation for her troubled marriage is that her husband Marco is a sociopath She then continues to refer to him as a sociopath throughout the book I realize that sociopath is a term which is currently very popular in our culture and many books have been written describing foolproof ways you too can diagnose everyone in your life as having anti social personality disorder I find this ridiculous "Is Marco A Sociopath "Marco a sociopath have no idea but neither does she Yes he IS a jerk a liar and a cheat and it struck me from the beginning of the *story that perhaps he was using her to obtain his green card yes he was an illegal immigrant *that perhaps he was using her to obtain his green card yes he was an illegal immigrant many many people lie and cheat Are they ALL sociopaths Probably not And the thing I found most astonishing is that Ms Waite mentioned her sociopathy theory to her therapist and the therapist readily agreed with her that marco was a sociopath I found this incredible What therapist would assign a label of sociopath to a person she had never met let alone examined At this point I can only conclude that Ms Waite wanted to sell books and she found a sensational way to do so My sympathy for her became harder to muster I AM sorry Jen Waite chose a man for her life partner who turned out to be a liar and a cheat that is a very tough life lesson and I hope she will be able to find some peace of mind as she has a daughter to raise I am wondering if down the line she will regret publishing this book because I don t think she was at all thinking about the future and how her daughter might feel about her father and about her family as a wholeI don t feel comfortable assigning any memoir less than 3 stars because I think it does take courage to share your pain and humiliation with the world I can t RATE someone s feelings At the same time I can t really say I recommend this book either unless of course you are a person who finds yourself in a similar situation Maybe then the reading this book would allow you to realize you definitely are not alone in your experiences This book was not what I expected and not in a good way Based on the blurb we re led to believe A Beautiful Terrible Thing will be something shocking out of the ordinary unbelievable But what we get isnone of those things Yes Waite s husband is a liar a cheater a seemingly remorseless jerk who s constantly trading in his girl for a younger modelbut guess what So are a lot of other people As sad and hurtful as those behaviors are they are not that extraordinary And while I get that this experience was traumatic and painful for Waite I m not sure it warrants publishing a memoirMuch of the book reads like diary entries of Waite chronicling the rise and fall of her relationship and as you d expect from a dear diary entry it s flowery and not particularly well written and ultimately a bit adolescent the incessant use of babe and baby as a term of endearment and the actual printing of the phrase bro code in a serious usage as two glaring examples Then we follow her down the rabbit hole of trying to figure out WHY WHY WHY everything happened and are treated to scenes of her researching sociopathy on internet message boards and Wikipedia these sources aren t reliable enough to be used for a school paper let alone an actual published book But wait Lest we think the entire premise of this book was based on Waite amateurly diagnosing her husband with an actual personality disorder thanks to the internet she magically finds validation in a real live therapist I find it INCREDIBLY hard to believe that a therapist would provide even a guess at a diagnosis for someone they ve never even spoken to and that said therapist would use that as the focus for Waite s visits In a nutshell unless you like rubbernecking at car accidents or find fascination in other people s suffering skip this one There s no big reveal no revelation nothing even really educational in this memoir except for the reminder that rose colored glasses are never the best lenses through which to view your world. Delity and betrayal than she could have imagined Waite obsessively analyzes her relationship trying to find a single moment from the last five years that isn't part of the long con of lies and manipulation With a dual timeline narrative structure we see Waite's romance bud bloom and wither simultaneously making the heartbreak and disbelief even affectin. ,
2 starsRead through the courtesy of NetGallery and PENGUIN GROUP Blue Rider Press PlumePlume When you let yourself think that you are only worth what This memoir felt half baked to me Waite s conclusion that her ex husband is a psychopath is based on her internet searches which are recounted here in not so fascinating detail Without something definitive than that though it was hard for me to now what to think I mean he was a terrible husband there s no doubt about that but I was also baffled at Waite s own behavior specifically the way she seemed to be in the habit of snooping into his private messages from early on in their courtship It never seemed like a healthy marriage to me so I wasn t super invested in its dissolution There s also the fact that all of this happened disconcertingly recently Waite mentions her money troubles at the end and I had a nagging feeling that this book was rushed for financial reasons I think A Beautiful Terrible Thing would have benefited from a few years of introspection on Waite s part Having said all that the book definitely ept my attention and I read it in less than two days If you re just looking to gawk at a trainwreck no judgment on my part that s why I picked it up this memoir fits the bill nicely In this memoir Jen Waite tells the story of her failed marriage I decided to read the book after I saw the author being interviewed on television and became curious about her tragic taleJen WaiteThe date January 20 2015 will be forever etched on Jen Waite s brain It was on that day when her baby Louisa was 3 weeks old that Jen saw the e mail from her husband Marco Medina to a real estate brokerJen Waite with her baby Louisa The message read My girlfriend and I have decided to go with another apartment but thank you for your time FYI Marco Medina isn t his real name According to Daily Entertainment News Waite a former actress and model disguises her ex hubby s identity calling him Marco and also saying he is from Argentina but the real subject of her book is Carlos Beltran originally from ColombiaJen Waite s husband Marco Medina aka Carlos BeltranWhat Girlfriend Jen hysterically confronted her husband who explained that he d been helping a Croatian co worker look for a new place to live and had mistakenly used the word girlfriend In her confusion Jen accepted this account but not really and her suspicions increased when she looked at the Croatian s Facebook page and saw a sexy blonde vixen In addition Marco s behavior became and disturbing and he claimed that something was wrong with him because he felt nothing when he looked at Jen and Louisa Jen became terribly concerned about Marco s health and tried to find ways to cure him but had little successEventually Jen came to fear that Marco had been having an affair with the Croatian who she dubbed Croella for months starting when Jen was pregnant with LouisaCruella DeVille from 101 Dalmations Marco consistently denied any wrongdoing insisting he was just friends with the foreignerwho wasn t his type For her part Jen tried to convince herself that Marco was a faithful husband But the evidence of cheating built upJen s blinders came offand the marriage imploded This left Jen a single mother depressed devastated and barely able to go on The book alternates between Before and After In the Before chapters Jen writes about meeting Marco and the intense courtship that led to their marriage In the After chapters Jen details her step by step unveiling of Marco s perfidy her decision to leave him and the subseuent fallout that almost destroyed herBefore Jen was an aspiring model and actress from Maine living in New York City to further her career Jen Waite was an aspiring model and actressShe was waitressing to make ends meet and rarely saw her long distance boyfriend Jeff When Jen took a job at an about to open new restaurant she met bar manager Marco at the orientation and it was like lightning struck her Jen Waite was attracted by Marco s dark good looksMarco a dark handsome Argentinian overwhelmed Jen with flattery and attention a behavior called love bombing and appealed to her sympathy when he admitted that he was living in the country illegally had been in two long term but failed relationships and had a son Sebwho lived with his mother Long story short Jen fell madly in love with Marco and dumped Jeff Marco seemed to be the ideal boyfriend affectionate respectful charming and ambitiousand "he got a thumbs up from Jen s friends and family Jen "got a thumbs up from Jen s friends and family Jen so far as to invest 75000 in a restaurant Marco wanted to open certain that they would be partners for life Jen Waite and Marco got engagedMarco soon proposed which led to marriage pregnancy and the birth of Louisa Jen thought her life was perfect and she was ecstatically happyuntil that fateful day January 20After Once Jen started to suspect that Marco was seeing Croella she began to check his emails phone records take out deliveries and Uber account and uncovered evidence of innumerable lies and deceptions Jen decided to leave her husband but
he acted sad and pathetic and with the help of his parents initially convinced her toacted sad and pathetic and with the help of his parents initially convinced her to Marco s infidelity continued however and Jen finally left with Louisa moving to Maine to live with her parents Jen s parents are the heroes of the book They re supportive and helpful and always have their daughter s backJen Waite and Louisa moved to MaineThough Jen moved out she couldn t move on and felt compelled to now everything that was going on between Marco and Croella Thus Jen CONSTANTLY refreshed her smartphone to look at Marco and Croella s posts on Facebook Instagram Twitter and so on Jen spent hours and hours doing
this every dayunable to stop herself Further Jen discussed her sad situation with EVERYONE and cameevery dayunable to stop herself Further Jen discussed her sad situation with EVERYONE and came learn that Marco was serially unfaithful and had cheated with waitresses throughout their courtship and marriage As Jen tried to make sense of the unhealthy partnership that she d considered ideal she became an amateur psychologist Jen spent day after day looking up internet articles about cheating spouses and concluded that Marco was a sociopath Jen Waite concluded that Marco was a sociopathThe urban dictionary defines a sociopath as follows Sociopaths are people who have little to no conscience They will lie cheat steal and manipulate others for their own benefit They re really nice and charming at first but it s extremely fake There is no reasoning with this person Things have to be their way or it s the highway They will blame you for hurting them even if they re the ones who hurt you or blame the world for all their problems They are compulsive liars and even if they do apologize it s never genuine Piece of advice Once you realize that you are dealing with a sociopath RUNWhen Jen discovers that Marco is a sociopath everything becomes clear to her and she comprehends the reasons for his adultery and hurtful behavior This doesn t make things any easier though and Jen continues to stalk Marco and Croella online Jen s sadness and her painful discoveries about Marco s new relationship make her physically ill Jen Waite grew physically illShe gets stomach aches and panic attacks loses weight doesn t shower is unable to leave the house for any length of time and so on It s not until Jen seeks help from a professional psychologist that she begins to move on very very slowly At the beginning of the book Jen avers that she s not a mental health professional and can t make a clinical diagnosis of psychopathy mental illness I m not a mental health professional either and I m not at all convinced Marco is a sociopath It seems to me that Marco like. What do you do when you discover that the person you've built your life around never existed When it could never happen to me does happen to you These are the uestions facing Jen Waite when she begins to realize that her loving husband the father of her infant daughter her best friend the love of her life fits the textbook definition of psychopath In ,
Jen Waite Æ 2 Characters,
Many other men might just be a serial cheater who can t Bloodleaf keep his pants zipped That said Marco is not a nice guyand IT IS telling that he shows no interest in little Louisa and never sees her Marco had numerous affairs with womenOther reviewers have mentioned that Jen should have allowed time to pass before writing a book about her trauma and I agree I think that further distance from the breakup would have allowed Jen to pen a objective narrative It s very harsh to throw around the word sociopathparticularly with no clinical diagnosis by a trained therapist The book is readable but it s repetitive stuffed with filler and feels fictionalized to me Jen remembers incidents in remarkable detail and spends a good part of the book talking about her child In the narrative Jen is constantlyissing Louisa s head smoothing the baby s hair looking into the child s eyes dressing the child undressing the child breastfeeding the baby talking to Louisa cooing at Louisa walking to the beach with the baby walking through the mall with the baby passing Louisa to grandma passing Louisa to grandpa and so forth I have no doubt that Jen loves Louisa but I don t need to hear that much about itJen Waite and Lousia All in all I wouldn t call this a great book but I think it might be helpful to people who have doubts about their partner to show them how to identify a cheater and to people going through a painful breakup to demonstrate that there s light at the end of the tunnel Jen plans to become a licensed therapist specializing in recovery from psychopathic relationships and I wish her the best of luck with thatYou can follow my reviews at GR friend Julie described reading A Beautiful Terrible Thing as gawking at a train wreck My feelings exactly And let me add a few other feelings While clearly personally devastating Ms Waite s experience of betrayal of having been duped by her ex husband is sadly not that unusual I can think of a few people I now who have had similar experiences some of them far jaw dropping I hope for Ms Waite that in the years to come especially when her daughter becomes old enough to read this book she doesn t have too much writer s remorse I m sure writing and publishing this book felt cathartic but I m not sure how well that feeling will age I m surprised a mainstream publisher picked this one up The telling through dual timelines is clever but other than that this is not a particularly unusual story and the self analysis at the end is really amateurAll this to say I feel bad for Ms Waite in the way I would feel bad if a friend or acuaintance was telling me this story but I m a bit stumped as to why it s book worthyTake my review with a grain of salt This book made me feel really judgmental which is one of my least favourite reactions when reading a memoir Clearly other readers have felt far empathy for Ms Waite or otherwise got shock value out of her storyThanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read an advance copy 4 stars publishes 71117 Thanks to First to Read and Plume Books for an Advanced digital copy of this book for an honest review This is a memoir of pain and suffering It stems from a hurtful event that must go through the cycle of pain and anger doubt and self loathing It is the feeling of helplessness when you realize that your love cannot heal the problem This story is very candid Jen Waite has spent most of her marriage trying to ignore the signs of an unfaithful husband He always has a reason an excuse a story to cover any mishap Jen wants to believe him she loves him Her happy marriage is falling apart Her husband is cheating Jen has just had a baby with the man she planned to spend the rest of her life with What has happened What went wrong This story chronicles Jen s discovery her self doubt the excruciating admission to herself and her recovery from a bad marriage to a psychological liar and sociopath This novel is written without any excuses Jen does not hide from the facts nor from her inability to process this life altering event Take this journey with Jen and decide what you would have done in her situation E galley provided by Edelweiss Penguin Publishing Group and Author Jen Waite for my honest opinion To be published July 11 2017What if the man you thought you married turned out to be someone else entirely "What do you do when your dream guy the father of "do you do when your dream guy the father of infant daughter turns out to be a liar a cheat possibly even a sociopath In retrospect would you see the signs Using a format of alternating chapters of Before and After Jen Waite does her best to tell her story so others might not have to go through the heartbreak that she has experienced It is not always easy to follow and a bit choppy at times but her willingness to bare her soul is the major strength of this book Heartfelt this memoir could have benefited from better editing If you re uestioning your gut feelings that something is not right in your relationship this could be the right book for you Wow I don t now what I missed but this read like
the self indulgent recounting of the end of a relationship but definitely not something so shocking it merited a memoir Iself indulgent recounting of the end of a relationship but definitely not something so shocking it merited a memoir I like I was listening to a self centered friend tell a story of woe as though she was the only person in the world to ever have her heart broken by an unscrupulous man Her husband cheated and lied while she was pregnant and was stunningly dishonest about his affair when confronted with the evidence At times he was clearly conflicted about whether he even wanted to *End The Marriage So He *the marriage so he her mixed and ambiguous signals which was a crazy making experience to read about and I m sure much much crazier to experience But this to me does not a psychopath make Their problems were worsened I think because both she and her husband seemed incredibly immature and her parents though loving and supportive were also a little overly involved in the marriage of their adult daughter They were overly indulgent when they invested tens of thousands of dollars in the start up of a restaurant for a couple who had no business acumen that was mentioned the daughter is a struggling actress and the son in law a bartender which she and her husband then basically walk away from because their partners are being weird and mean to them All in all the couple at the center of the memoir felt like children playing at being adults and that was only exacerbated by her parents infantilizing her every step of the way But there s nothing like an actual child to take care of to make things start feeling real and that s when her husband the Peter Pan of their marriage decided he would book No surprise there in my mindAnd finally the idea that she would while her daughter is still an infant publicly brand her ex a psychopath is stunningly shortsighted and vindictive The marriage failed He treated her abominably He was a terrible spouse But by her own recounting he has a positive relationship with his son from a previous relationship Now she s certainly made it difficult at best for one to develop with his daughter who will grow up to face this eternal condemnation of her father Her decision to tell this story as though it is only HER story smacks of the same Mismatch kind of blind narcissism she accuses her former spouse of Relationships end People do crappy crappy hurtful things to each other while it unravels But this made me feel a little sorry for theidThis in my opinion was the product of the Me Generation who from the time they were in diapers were assured by their parents that nothing bad should ever ever happen to them And if it does then they are owed acknowledgment of their. Raw first person account Waite recounts each heartbreaking discovery every life destroying lie and reveals what happens once the dust finally settles on her demolished marriageAfter a disturbing email sparks Waite's suspicion that her husband is having an affair she tries to uncover the truth and rebuild trust in her marriage Instead she finds lies infi.